Every time I meet an old school or college friend after many years, I think about how much we have changed. For many of us, it has been more than two decades. We started together with no real idea where life would take us. Same classrooms, same exams, same silly jokes, and the same uncertainty about the future.
Nobody was a CEO, a Director, a Founder or a senior executive back then. We were simply friends. Perhaps that is why I have always looked forward to reunions. For a few hours, I expect us to go back to being those people again. But over the years, something else has become clear to me.
Sometimes, people don’t just bring their memories to these gatherings. They bring their designations, achievements, wealth and social standing with them. And that, by itself, isnt a problem. People should be proud of what they have achieved. What I find uncomfortable is when those achievements start becoming a lens through which we see others, especially when someone who hasn’t achieved as much by conventional measures is treated differently.
And I have caught myself doing it too. A few years ago, my father sensed the tone I was using while talking about an old friend. He immediately corrected me. It made me question how easily we start judging people by where we think we stand in life.
My father had a great career and retired from a leadership role at L&T. But what I remember most wasnt his designation. It was how approachable he was. Whenever I visited his office, I noticed the affection he received from his driver, the office service staff, the workers and others who were often invisible to people in senior positions. He made them feel like they were part of the larger project, not just people doing a job around it.
That is what I learned from watching him. How you treat people should never depend on where they stand. I think the same applies to old friends. When we meet the people who knew us back then, do any of those titles and achievements really matter? The person sitting across the table is still the person who knew you when you were figuring out your own life. They knew you before the promotions, before the fancy job titles and before anyone cared about your LinkedIn profile.
Maybe that is what reunions should remind us of. Success can change our circumstances and responsibilities, but hopefully not how we see people. Because one of the nicest things about old friends is that they remember who you were before the world started telling you who you had become.
